Diary of a Grumpy Old Man

My 2009 Year in Review

Thu, 24 Dec 2009 17:31:49 -0500

2009 has been an eventful year for me. Some of it horrible, some of it hopeful, and some of it celebratory, but the one certain thing is, it was significant.

The Good:

Meeting some fine Twitter-folk - So far this year I’ve gotten drunk with @phyllisstein, @tehawesome, @alegna24, @DolciSogni, @tehawesome, @CcSteff, @joeschmidt, @lindstifa, @the_dza, @emzbulletproof, @bcompton, and @riebschlager. And I hugged @lindstifa’s mom inappropriately.
Getting out of the Army - This has been 9 years in the making. I joined at age 17 on a six-by-two contract, meaning I agreed to actively drill for six years, and go on inactive reserve (meaning I wouldn’t drill but could be called up for deployment) for another two years. My plan was to do bare minimum and get my college paid for. Well, as soon as I got deployed to Kosovo, that plan went to shit. Then came Iraq, and reinlisting for three more years. So, nine years later, and I’m finally done.
The Fest 8 - The one thing I look forward to every year is the Fest, an annual weekend-long punk rock festival in Gainesville, Florida. I met some amazing people and saw some amazing bands. I also drank enough to kill a small horse. Truly one of the best things about this year. Whether there will be a Fest 9 is up in the air, but Harvest of Hope is on!
Getting a full time job - My original intention was to move out of Omaha, to a bigger city, but jobs are hard to come by in this economy. I took a full time position doing pretty much the same thing I have been doing for 3 years as an intern: Managing a fairly large ColdFusion infrastructure, and supporting a hundred or so developers.
Graduating college - I started school in 2002, so yes, I’ve been going to college for eight years. I’ve also spent about three of those years deployed or in training, so cut me some fucking slack. :-)
Mason - One of my best friends got me a cat so I wouldn’t have to drink alone. He’s awesome. I can’t say enough about the little guy.

The Bad

Missing the Lawrence Arms New Year show - The year started off shitty. I was at Reggie’s Rock Joint in Chicago waiting for the Lawrence Arms to kick off their New Year show, unaware that they were playing Reggie’s Rock *Club*, which I can only assume was in the basement. At any rate, I panicked and ended up driving around looking for parking during the show, missing all of it, and eating bad chinese food during the count down. Major bummer.
Being sick - I have probably been to the doctor more this year than any other. And because I won’t have medical insurance until I start my full time job, my only option is the VA, which is less than desirable. My real problem with the VA is, there are long wait times, unless you don’t mind seeing a random doctor, and they give out the cheapest meds possible, making recovery less than optimal.
Flirting with poverty - As a consequence of dropping my dependence on the Army, I also dropped a substantial portion of my income. With credit cards near-maxed and my bank account in the negatives, I’m forced to find more… innovative ways to get by. At least until I get my first real paycheck.

The Ugly

Breakups - Two breakups have made the year fairly rough. But I’ve powered through them and am stronger because of them.
Wrecking my car - twice - I shouldn’t own a nice car.

In 2010, I have big plans. I’ll be keeping you guys updated regularly on the Twitter, and hopefully still entertaining you. Thanks to those of you who are still following me even after my departure and return to Twitter.

Talk later. Kiss kiss. Merry Christmas!

Oh hey Tumblr!

Mon, 16 Nov 2009 16:40:23 -0500

Just thought I’d post this little mass email I got from a guy in my International Studies class. I lol’d.

Hey people, I gotta huge favor for any willing to help me out.

I have missed these convention things the past few weeks due to me having a full time job and they don’t exactly let me “call in” without getting written up. The ones earlier in the morning, on those dates (lucky me..) i have had exams. If there is anyone, ANYONE willing to help me out at all with some notes taken at these events, i would severely appreciate it. I am pretty desperate here and will pay whoever can get me something first, 20$.

Begging hardcore here..

Thanks ahead of time for helping me not fail this class. lol.

-Andrew

P.S. i know there was a sign in sheet at some of these, and i have already thought about how to handle that situation, thanks again!

Sooooo....

Thu, 16 Apr 2009 03:02:49 -0400

Okokok. Maybe TODAY’S the day I Tumblr. F’reals this time.

Ok. So, let’s just start simple. Things I know.

Boobies. They’re pretty cool. Or so I’ve seen on the computer.

Ummmm. Beer is pretty aweso-YES! Beer!

Old Style recently (and by recently, I mean my local store just got them in) released their new “Authentically Kraeusened” beer. LET ME TELL YOU, it is both Authentic AND Kraeusened. AND Beer. Man, those cheeseheads don’t lie.

Oh, and on a TOTALLY UNRELATED NOTE, I got in a car wreck today because my mind was wandering. Yes. I was thinking about things. Let me break this down mathematically for you.

Things I SHOULD be thinking about while driving
= {The Road, Cars, Traffic, Pedestrians, Traffic Laws, Street Signs, Traffic Lights}

Things I was thinking about ⊄ Things I SHOULD be thinking about while driving
∎

If you don’t follow that, don’t worry. I got a ticket for “following too closely” so I’m following closely enough for all of us.

Well, I’m glad we all know what happens when I’m drunk and sad and alone; I use my Tumblr. God help us all.

(via insooutso) This is obviously not me. This baby’s...

Sun, 05 Apr 2009 12:03:40 -0400

(via insooutso)

This is obviously not me. This baby’s father is paying WAY too much attention to him. Plus, what’s he got there, Schlitz? We probably wouldn’t even have hung out.

I usually write “FOR ANAL BEADS AND KY” in the memo...

Thu, 05 Mar 2009 13:43:42 -0500

I usually write “FOR ANAL BEADS AND KY” in the memo field, but this is good too.

katydidsays:

Apparently this is what happens when you piss off an engineer.

Yikes.

Twumblrbookspacer

Thu, 05 Feb 2009 01:12:47 -0500

Yay! Tumblr! Yet another goddamned Web 2.0 (BETA) thing to figure out.

Ok, so if I don’t “follow” or “heart” you or whatever, cut me some fucking slack . Still figuring this damn thing out.

To my credit, I’ve got Twitter down to a science. Srsly. Here’s the algorithm:

boolean funnyTweet(string tweet)
{

switch(tweet)

{

case: tweet.contains(“[Bb]acon”)

return true;

case: tweet.contains(“[Hh]obo[- ][Vv]agina”)

return true;

case: tweet.contains(“[Gg]uy\ [Kk]awasaki”) && !tweet.contains(“(sucks | douche)”)

return false;

default:

return true;

}

}

So yeah, give me a second to figure this shit out. Hey. I WRITE software, I don’t USE it! God. What do you want from me?!

Courtesy of @MsHiss.

Tue, 03 Feb 2009 23:19:31 -0500

Courtesy of @MsHiss.

While at work, it is important to focus on the task at hand,...

Tue, 03 Feb 2009 00:49:25 -0500

While at work, it is important to focus on the task at hand, lest you be easily distracted.

7 Things

Mon, 12 Jan 2009 10:26:00 -0500

Goddamnit. I was tagged in this stupid Twitter chain letter thing. Fine. I’ll play along.

Seven things you may or may not know about me.

1. While I am pretty depraved, I do have my limits. I don’t like talking about pooping or farting. Sure, everybody’s gotta do it. But it’s not that funny and it’s just something I’d rather not envision. Pooping in a toilet is not groundbreaking.

2. I suck at most “guy things.” I don’t watch sports voluntarily. Changing the oil on a car is the extent of my mechanical abilities. I can program a computer, but not a VCR/DVD player. I’ve been hunting once, and I just watched. I can do manual labor, but I prefer not to. And I can’t fix shit around the house. My expertise lies in Computer Science and music, and that’s where I’d prefer to keep it.

3. I probably don’t want to check out that new band you’ve been listening to. For one, my musical tastes are fairly obscure. Moreover, I connect with music differently than most people. It’s kind of hard to describe, but in short, I integrate a particular album into certain points in my life and the memories from that period are forever fused with that soundtrack. This means that I will often listen to one album for weeks or months on end. When I’m able to see that band live, it’s always a spiritual experience.I usually won’t share music with other people either, to avoid the possibility that they ruin that experience for me.

4. I love my area of study and will respect you less if you don’t love yours. If you don’t love what you’re doing, why are you doing it?

5. I am super low maintenance. I can sleep in a car, on a park bench, in a train station - I once slept under the Eiffel Tower in Paris. I didn’t have a place to stay and that seemed as good as any place to sleep. I despise hotels and am a firm believer in Couchsurfing. I hear a lot of, “But what if they rob you, or kill you, or make breakfast and leave the eggs out after they leave?” Well, actually, that last bit did happen. But that’s the worst of it. I’ve met a lot of cool people by both hosting, and being hosted. I think the answer to a lot of our problems is more community. Care for others, and you will be cared for. It’s pretty simple. I guess that makes me a Commie. And on the smaller scale, yes I am.

6. I’m not easily pegged with politics. My teenage years are filled with memories of angst-ridden punk rock and Anarchy. And the real Anarchy too. The kind where people live free from government and authority and everyone takes care of each other. But - since that kind of Utopian society isn’t easily achievable (if at all), I tend to place my allegiances more rationally. I am officially a Green Party member, because I believe in their ideals, and I think we need more than just two parties in the United States. But again, bowing to my practical and logical side, I tend to vote centrist, for the issues and candidates that I think have the best shot at benefiting the greater good.

7. I have had a horrible dating life… Until now. Up to this point, every girl I’ve dated has pretty much just been out of convenience or a feeling of it being the thing to do at the time. I finally found a girl who I feel like I share a connection with and that is amazing. The stars seem to have aligned on this one. I would be lying if I said I hadn’t become extremely cynical about relationships and women and people in general. But I think I’ve finally broken that ugly streak. ‘Bout time!

Alright. This fulfills my obligation in this stupid chain letter. I hope you’ve enjoyed it. I haven’t. :-P

Oh, and I guess I have to tag people. Here, now you people have to deal with this:

eoporto

courtneyisneato

badkitty_

alegna24

homerdash

eatfoss

cranium

This is getting to be an annoying trend. Fix your shit, Twitter!

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 09:35:09 -0400

This is getting to be an annoying trend.

Fix your shit, Twitter!

My Mini is in the shop, currently accumulating debt for me. In...

Wed, 25 Jun 2008 20:27:00 -0400

My Mini is in the shop, currently accumulating debt for me.

In the mean time, I decided to try biking to work.

Every time I get this idea, I am reminded how much biking sucks in Omaha. There are no useful bike lanes, Dodge street is a death trap, it’s hot and humid as shit, and the hills. Oh, the hills.

Maybe I’ll take the bus tomorrow. :-/

Paper Recycle Bin Label

Sun, 22 Jun 2008 18:11:35 -0400

Paper Recycle Bin Label

Glass Recycle Bin Label

Sun, 22 Jun 2008 18:10:32 -0400

Glass Recycle Bin Label

Metal Recycle Bin Label

Sun, 22 Jun 2008 18:10:03 -0400

Metal Recycle Bin Label

Plastic Recycle Bin Label

Sun, 22 Jun 2008 18:09:19 -0400

Plastic Recycle Bin Label

Start:

Sun, 22 Jun 2008 18:08:34 -0400

Ah, the worst part of blogging: Getting started.

I joined tumblr due to Twitter’s lack of media posting capabilities.

What follows is a set of recycle bin lables I just made.

Enjoy.